Last night, I was washing up the dinner dishes, rambling off a list of things I had to do — laundry, grocery shopping, adjusting my hair appointment because I’d planned it at the same time as our dentist appointments — when my daughter asked me to take a break and watch a show instead.
Okay, I did. There are moments when our children will be our best teachers of what really matters in life and it was one of those moments. But as I sat there trying to be a little twitching in the moment because at some point these things do have to be done, it made me realize something:
Moms don’t get a break ever
Sure, some can take a quick snooze in the afternoon but as we dozing off, we ‘re dreaming about what we’re going to do when we wake up to make up for it.
You could even dream that you are swimming literally in a sea of to-do objects. I know I’ve got one more time. And if we go away with our partner, friends or on our own for a weekend, we ‘re not always off the clock entirely. We wonder if everyone is healthy, how much sugar they consume and whether they fall asleep OK without us.
We can’t wait to get back to our family and squeeze them, but we know that we can deal with big messes. Being a mom means being unable to lose yourself completely in the moment. It means that you put the needs of other people before yourselves. That means you have energy for
your children, but not for yourself. This means you ‘re doing something very nice with a friend but in the back of your mind, you ‘re trying to remember when the next doctor’s appointment is, and if it’s time to buy new shoes from your child because they’ve been walking strange tonight.
A Once In A While Break
When you are a parent, people tell you to make sure you ‘take a break every now and then’ But what they will tell you is to do what they can to try to partially step away from motherhood to take a breather. Having a real break is no longer a privilege given to you, because you can’t shut off your mom’s brain, no matter how hard you try. Perhaps it is because we just don’t want to.
No matter where we are or what we are doing, our minds are continuously churning away.
It’s the ultimate sacrifice and maybe, one day, we’ll be able to turn our brains off completely, but I’m pretty sure it’ll be a long time. Meanwhile I’m sure the brief clips we ‘re taking are going to be enough. They will be.